A Nice Day Off - with no thinking

So, I got a much needed day off yesterday (if you couldn't tell from my previous post - i needed a little break). I also have a bonus day today and I am looking forward to that too.
Monday was such a "beautimus" day (my own special word) to express how great something is. I went to Salem, Massachusetts to share the day with the witches. Salem, each year in October, celebrates Halloween like no other place in the world. I toured the town, walked around quite a bit, including into the next town, enjoyed some crazy colored leaves and even enjoyed some peace in the quiet of a cemetery. I know that sounds strange, but it brought a little comfort to sit among the people who watch over us today. Also, as you will see in the photos, you can see why I enjoyed it as much as I did.
I was reminded of something interesting - that the salem witch trials and being in ministry are connected...hmmmm...haha...I'm just sayin'
The great part about the day came in the form of no thinking at all on my part. I just relaxed, listened to music, drove a little bit, and just walked where my feet took me. Even though I did have a map of Salem, but outside of that bit of direction, I did no thinking at all. It was a day to simply relax, enjoy the autumn, enjoy the people, and just enjoy the day.

And today - it is raining, so what can I do on a rainy day? Sleep is a good thing and I did that. In fact, missed two phone calls from my landlord right above me because I was asleep. haha. But before my nap, I did a cool thing and went to a pottery store to paint a piece of pottery. How cool is that? I had not done that before and I spent a couple of hours at the store just enjoying the time, the focus being on the piece and listening to some cool music.

It has been a good couple of days to "refresh" my mind, heart, and spirit.

Emotional Roller Coaster is insanity

Hello,
Yes - I know I have not written in a while. I am not even sure where to begin. Things have been insane since the last I blogged. I have been extremely busy and running around corners here and there. I have been home, been to Wisconsin, mourned the loss of someone in my house and 600 miles away, and enjoyed wonderful wonderful praise from a "family" far away.
A Visit Home
First - at the end of September, I got to see my first Red Sox game, live and in color. That was pretty cool. Then I got to visit Richmond. My home church, New Highland Baptist, invited me as a guest speaker at their 10th anniversary celebration. It was wonderful. It was great to see the "family" that I am referring to. Many had not seen me since I left Richmond. And I got to see a dear family with whom I had breakfast with, and cherish the moment with them. I got to say what I needed to say in order to move on. I got to prove to them that I can become a pretty decent minister and confident in what I do. The comments and the support were overwhelming and so rewarding.
Also, while I was home, I had to say goodbye to an unobtainable goal. After 38 years, I realized that I am not going to be able to change the behavior of some people and I am not going to get what I need. So I finally said goodbye to that thought and accepted the reality.
Thankfully though, my last day in town, I visited with my mentor and educating extraordinaire from seminary - Dr. Galindo. It was good to see him and catch up. He was so proud of me. He was so happy to see me and see what I am doing in Christian Education. It was so good to hear from him how proud he is and at the same time, he challenged me to be...me...in the only way that Dr. G could. To hear those words from one who has made such an impact on me, in the most positive way, makes everything else that we go through worthwhile. Oh...if I can hold onto a smidgen of all that he has given to me, I will do alright.
I completed my visit in Richmond, with my dear friend for remainder of the day, helping him through some stuff and giving back to him what he has given to me for so many years.
The Loss of an Angel
Shortly after I was back in town, I had to say goodbye to my angel, Gracie, my cat of 13 1/2 years. She made it through so much and before my trip to Richmond, had a wonderful checkup. Then she got worse and worse fast. I knew columbus day weekend after an emergency visit, that it was bad. Monday morning the 13th, I got the call that she was in severe kidney failure. I knew before the phone call what it was and knew what needed to be done. With a dear friend, I will call the "lighthouse" by my side, I watched as Gracie crossed the rainbow into God's arms around 10:00 Monday morning. With a sigh from her and a prayer from my friend, I knew she was gone. Don't let anybody deny you the impact that an animal has in your life. Gracie was with me through hell and back and during a time when not many people were supporting me. Gracie and Jelly Bean are my family here in Boston and I have lost one.
Life Continues On
The afternoon after I put Gracie down, I had to begin a three day intense workshop on family systems and ministry. There is when I found out that I had to let go of that unobtainable reality mentioned earlier. I finished Wednesday afternoon, with a lot of homework to work on and had to leave the next morning for Green Lake, Wisconsin. Those three days were intense and then I had a four day trip to a conference that gave us no break. It was an introduction to the American Baptist Church denomination and they jammed everything they could into those four days, with travel as well. I had to leave Jelly Bean alone for that time, without an opportunity to grieve her.
I came back late Monday night and back to work on Tuesday. Wednesday, I brought Gracie's remains home, after she stayed in my office all day. I would not recommend that to anybody. She now sits on the mantel and watches over us in her little wooden box. Jelly Bean is doing well, but I can imagine she wonders where her sister is.
Today was my first day off in two weeks and my body woke up at 10:00, after a long and mistake filled day on Friday. I am realizing the impact on my body and mind of all that has happened in the past month and I am hoping for some much needed rest and a lap in which to lay my head. Continue to pray for me as we head into the holiday season and all that will come with that, as I continue to ride this roller coaster. Thank you for checking in.

Did I Forget to Mention???

I forgot to mention another big event that happened in the last month. Do I remember Coach Mike Krzyzewski and the US Men's Team win gold?? Let's see...what college team does he coach? hmmmm

Florida, Community Organizers Rock, and Challenges

Ok..i know I have not posted in a while. Things have been pretty busy up here since I got back from Florida: trying to catch up from what I missed while out and then getting ready for the new programming year at church. Plus, I have been watching the political stuff that is happening, and I use that word “stuff” instead of others.

Florida was, under the circumstances, a nice trip, minus the travel part. I thank everyone for your thoughts and prayers. My family is doing well and there were a lot of wonderful friends of my uncle that I met. Wow – what a great honor and gift to see the impact he made on so many people.

It was good to see my family, especially my aunt and cousins, who I have not seen in a LONG time. I have posted a photo of them, even though I know one will strangle me for doing it, but they are great. Their sense of humor with the dog in my lap is pretty bad…that is a story for another time. Let’s just say that I am happy that I don’t have rabies and can sit down without pain!!! haha

(PS..we ran into the Pensacola Lighthouse..How bout that coincidence!?! Thank you Auntie Mo.)

So, I have a couple of things to say about the political stuff.

First of all, Sarah Palin does NOT represent all women, by no means. I don’t think I want my VP to be known as a “hot chick”. Hmmm..think not. Also, I am happy and proud to say that I am a community organizer who has a lot of responsibility. That was absolutely wrong to say that community organizers don’t have actual responsibility. I had some respect for her until she made the comment that community organizers have no actual responsibilities. yeah - that one hurt. It's uncool to take shots at people who chose to work in community service, which incidentally, is also serving the country...rather than get paid the big bucks in big law firms. not classy at all.

Second, Barack…you know that they are pulling at you and the whole lipstick/pg thing because they don’t want the focus to go back onto issues. They want to keep with the ugly stuff so they can’t be compared to the issues. They know that you will beat them on that and yet, you give in and fire back with your ugly stuff. You don’t need to fall to their level. Forget what they say and just stick to the issues. You will outscore them by several touchdowns on that. You know that McCain is using Palin as political manure...oops, I mean maneuver. Look, he can’t even hold a successful rally without her by his side. Anyway, he is pushing your buttons about the pig thing, even though he used the exact same phrase against Hillary Clinton, and trying to keep the focus off issues. Don’t fall for that.

I know a couple of people in Florida will be sending me notes about that political stuff…but McPalin irked me with the whole community organizer thing and the hypocritical piece about McCain can use the lipstick/pig comment, but not Obama. Not good to be a candidate who is getting desperate like that. Makes you wonder.

So, a lot is happening in the next few weeks for me and I am excited and overwhelmed at the same time. Going home for a couple of days, just a couple unfortunately, but I have been invited to participate in a special service at my home church. Unfortunately, I won’t get to see many people though. Then in October, I am going to Wisconsin for a minister thing – not looking forward to that.

I am also challenging myself in some ways professionally and personally, to start standing up for what I believe in, for what I know I am capable of doing, and because I have been given the knowledge and the gifts to do just that. I am actually capable of doing some good things and I need to start doing those things. I have to remember that I actually have something to contribute and something to continue to develop and make stronger.

So do you…and I would suggest you do the same.

RIP Uncle Tom

My Uncle Tom Pruett passed away last night, August 4, 2008, after a fighting a courageous battle with cancer.

Uncle Tom, I will do what I can to honor you and the courage you showed in the coming week and all the days that follow.

Say hi to Dad for me and I hope you enjoy a good game of cards while you pop open a can of bud.

Invest In Yourself

Isaiah 43:1; 4 - But now thus says the Lord, he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel; Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine. 4Because you are precious in my sight, and honored, and I love you, I give people in return for you, nations in exchange for your life.

You saw a recent post that I celebrated two years since being in Boston. Several people have asked me “what did you do to succeed in all these changes?” You are very kind in asking, but the first thing I would say is, change the word “succeed”. My work is nowhere near complete and there are many days that I fail at the process. I would not say “succeed” until I have fulfilled the final goal, which to be honest, I don’t know what that goal is yet. I guess the better question would be, “What did it take for you to “begin” these changes?”

I have had some time to reflect on this because I had to ask the same question in order to understand it myself. Honestly, I am not sure I understand it all to begin with, but I finally see what I had to do in order to begin the transformation.

1. Honestly, I had to stop being a hypocrite (at least on this topic) As a minister, I challenge people to continue to reach for better, to do what can be done to constantly learn and improve. I realized, how in the world can I ask the people to do that, if I am not doing it myself?

2. I had to stop listening to the “other” people. Since I was a child, I have been called many, many names in regards to my size…and not just from outside folks either. It continued through high school and college, however the names turned to rejection, ridicule, and harsh judgment…which oddly enough, continued on through to even the past few years. So with all that coming at you, from all levels, you tend to believe what they say and what they do.

3. The biggest thing I had to do was start investing in myself. I had always invested in my work and in my academics. But my personal life and health suffered greatly. The investing part has been my biggest challenge. I made a decision recently to get a trainer who works with me twice a month (couldn't afford more than that :-). I had the opportunity several months ago to begin the training but I could not see putting money into something like “that”. The “that” became me. I could not see putting that type of commitment and investment in myself. I realized that I could no longer do this transforming on my own and needed some additional help to get to the next level. This trainer is going to help me with that, and dare I say, kick my butt at the same time. I love the workout. I love the training. I love the challenge to reach for something better. Once I put the scale away and realized the “success” cannot be about the numbers (so don’t ask me how much I have lost, I won’t have an answer for you) I started to see "success" in a different way.

DISCLAIMER: I am nowhere near achieving these three steps because it is a process that continues on. But the key is that I finally recognized what I was doing on and I am working on the process. I have moved the bar down a little bit (because I had it way too high) and I have forgiven myself for things I have done in the past. I am also still working on forgiving others, and in many ways, that is the harder challenge.

The Isaiah scripture that I referenced above, reminds me why I need to do these steps. We are called by name. We are recognized as “precious”. We are loved and honored for being made by God. That is what I hold onto. That is the investment. God has invested in us – so shouldn’t I invest in myself?

RIP Randy Pausch

From cnn.com
Randy Pausch, a Carnegie Mellon University computer scientist whose "last lecture" about facing terminal cancer became an Internet sensation and a best-selling book, died Friday. He was 47.
You can view his last lecture on a previous post:
http://coachkfan.blogspot.com/2008/04/randy-pausch-lecture-really-achieving.html

Jimmy V on the ESPY Awards 1993

In honor of my courageous uncle and the many others fighting cancer.

A New Step, A New Ride, and a New Year

I forgot to finish telling you about my vacation week. On my last day off (that Monday that I was going to clean my apartment) I did something different. I took out all my clothing that is too big for me now. I filled my entire trunk with clothing that I can no longer wear and took it to the local donation center.
It was somewhat of a surreal moment for me. I kept the clothes as long as I did because I didn't want to feel like I was "wasting" anything. But there was a part of me that was certain that I would need the clothes again. I have been on the yo-yo. Those of you that know me, know that. Well, this is different. A lot has changed and I needed to show myself that I have the mind, the spirit, and the courage to say, NOPE, I won't need those clothes any more. I needed to prove to myself that I am going to be ok.

Now, the only disadvantage to all of that is, I don't have any pretty clothing now. I have the "business" clothing but nothing really pretty. Maybe that will be the next step. They say a journey is one step at a time.

Someone reminded me today that I did not show you my latest. I took another step and decided to challenge myself in the exercise adventures. I am a couple of miles from the church and I wanted something to get some exercise. The church is just long enough, that I am not in the mood to walk, so instead, I got a bike, and yes, I got a helmet too. It has been fun, but something to get used to. I have not ridden in a long time and my knees were surprisingly shocked at the "pain". haha. But it's getting better. I have ridden to work twice. I realized on one day that I cannot do a lot of pastoral visiting with the bike, so I have to work on that plan. But it was a good "investment" I should say. I have not perfected the idea yet, but it has been good to have and challenge myself to the next level.

And one more thing, it is two years this weekend the cats and I moved to Massachusetts to start my new adventures at FBC Newton. A lot has happened in the last two years don't you think? I won't get into it now. You can see it throughout this journal, but it has been a wonderful, most scary thing I have ever done; yet surprisingly courageous and transforming journey.

That's what it about really. Read the quote at the top of my blog from Coach Mike Krzyzewski and you will see what I mean.

Can't wait to see what happens in the "new" year.

Vacation time

ok - so I am finishing up a great week of vacation, a much needed vacation I might add, I decided to stay around town and do some things that I have not done before.
Monday - International Tennis Hall of Fame in Newport, Rhode Island where I got to see my fav, Stefan Edberg from Sweden. Then, I took a turn to Pawtucket to see the Richmond Braves get beaten by the Pawtucket Red Sox. They almost won, but not quite. The fans were pretty nice to me, although, one person thought that the 2nd baseman was my son. That hurt.
Tuesday - a tour of Sam Adams Boston Beer Brewery and I unfortunately, had to taste some ;-0 It is smaller than I thought but then I found out there are a few more around the nation. However, here is where they do the new "experiments".
Wednesday - Horseback riding to celebrate 120 pounds of weight loss!!! I have not been able to do that in a LONG time, about 10 years I think, when I got thrown off. It was definitely a nice little reward. I was smiling like a child the entire time! An hour on a beautiful mountain range. Very nice.
Thursday and Friday - I went to a monastery to be in a 24 hour silent prayer retreat and worship with some new friends, the Episcopal monks. This was more needed than anything I did this week, I think. It was nice to be away from the world for 24 hours and be in silence. Even the meals were taken in silence, with the exception of one person reading from a book. The worship was wonderful and uplifting. They were extremely hospitable
Saturday - rest, reflection, talking to family, a haircut and shopping. I was supposed to work on cleaning my apartment, well...that didn't happen
Sunday - I was off from worship today so I went and worshiped with the Boston Harbor Lighthouse. A bit foggy at first, then cleared up nicely. I even climbed to the top to see the beacon. A perfect symbolic end to the week that I had.
These are just a quick sketch of photos. I have LOTS more and will share with you in my snapfish. Send me a comment and I will send you the link.
Monday - rest before I return to work. ugh...probably working on my apartment

It was a good week. It was a much needed week. Since I have been here, I have not been able to really treat myself to trips like these. This was a spiritual week for me, focusing on some things that I needed to focus on. Before you ask, I did not go to Richmond, because I will be there in September and then at Christmas. (Plus, it's not cheap to fly, have someone take care of the cats, and much less drive, down south) This time needed to be about me. Selfish? I don't think so. You take vacation don't you??
It was fun. It was uplifting. It was rewarding. It was a treat. I was able to congratulate myself for getting this far with all the changes that have taken place in the past two years. Can you believe it's been two years since I moved up here??? It was a good week and a much needed one. Thank you for the prayers and support.

Happy Father's Day

Happy Father's Day Dad!
Miss you.

"This is Big"

Another Great DAD Gone too Soon

He said it frequently on the political trail, "This is big". Well, this is a big loss to the nation, to all fathers, and to all children.

Tim Russert of Meet the Press died today of a heart attack at the age of 58. A hard worker, a great family man, and a wonderful dad. You have a lot in common with my dad.

As Father's Day is celebrated this Sunday, on a day when it can seem darker than most for those who have lost their father, just as recent as today, let's celebrate dads as he celebrated his with all the world.

Rest in Peace.

Life, Death, and Life Again

Today was a mentally surreal day. I’m not even sure where I will go with this post, but I just feel the need to type. I got to preach today and I think it went well. I talked about how we need to reach out and touch someone, because that’s just the right thing to do. There was more to it than that, but I won’t bore you with the whole thing.

Well the reason I got to preach today is because of the little girl that you see on this post. She is the brand new girl of our Sr. Minister, who was born at 3:24 this morning. I got a chance to visit with them later on and it was such a beautiful sight. She was just 9 hours old and all curled up in daddy’s arms. She was making this little baby sounds that just melt your heart. To hear these sounds coming from this new life just makes all the stuff we go through worth the pain. She is precious. Life is precious. Those sounds were precious. It was a precious moment.

The afternoon proved to be rather hot. So I took a break from that “hot” weather, and went to see Iron Man. It was highly suggested to me and so I went. Rather rather excellent I must say. You should go see Iron Man. That is a movie all about heart, fighting an inner conflict, and beating the demons that you thought were stronger than you. And that’s when you realize that you are stronger than iron. And I don’t think they could have picked anybody better than Robert Downey Jr. to live this role.

But it was what I did after the movie that made it surreal, full circle if you will. I decided to go for a run and the place that my car took me was the cemetery. I know, it’s a little strange, but at the same time, rather peaceful. Imagine pounding the pavement, relieving the stress of the week, the mental roller coaster, the release of adrenaline that was keeping you going throughout the day. Then all of a sudden, you hear the voices of those present. Mind you, nobody was in the cemetery. It was around 7:00 this evening and it was just me and a few thousand rested souls. I heard the people at rest. I heard their families. I heard the moments that they had to say goodbye. I heard the tears of those who left too soon and I heard sighs of relief from those who had suffered much too long. At the same time, there was a sense of peace. It was calm. The Memorial Day flags were still up as a reminder of those who sacrificed and you could see flowers of those who had recently visited. Then as I was sitting by the pond, the bull frogs started talking. I wondered if it was God with a weird sense of humor, but they just started talking to one another.

As I was running, I came through a scene in one of my favorite movies, “The Contender”. Joan Allen’s character, Laine Hanson, is running through the Arlington Cemetery, as the President of the United States, is speaking to a joint session, talking about the unbelievably strong character that she maintained through a bloody assault from those who didn’t think she deserved the VP nomination. The whole experience of going through a struggle, whether it’s a public one or private, makes anybody want to consider quitting, but then you keep running and you keep going to the next level, because it could only make you stronger and eventually, when you least expect it, it just may give you new life – even as you are running through a cemetery.

Carol Burnett Show outtakes - Tim Conway's Elephant Story

This is my all time favorite outtake. No, Harvey Korman is not in it, but it's classic!!!! You have to watch all the way through to get the punch line!

Glad We Had This Time Together

I loved watching the Carol Burnett show growing up and one of the reasons was the Harvey Korman and Tim Conway team! How funny they are. Although, I must say that my favorite line from Harvey Korman came during the reunion show a couple of years ago. "Me using Viagra is like putting a brand new flag pole on a condemned building". I was in tears after that.
RIP Harvey Korman. As I heard this morning, "the world became a little more serious today"

then back to Newton

1. 10 little ducks walkin by the pond
2. duck, duck and a goose
3. Newton Cemetery honors veterans
4. First Church from a different view
5. and a sign i couldn't resist taking a picture of

more photos of Memorial Day

1. Three places within the Old North Church: The pulpit, a pew, and the back for the organ
2. a very expensive italian restaurant known around town, named Strega...i have seen the owner and I think "Godfather".
3. The home of the Boston Celtics!!



















4. Bunker Hill across the Charles River
5. One of the condos that only costs a couple million to own